FAREWELL HUNTER S. THOMPSON

I don't have many heroes, and most of them are dead. Now, one more of them is gone. Thompson's death got to me more than I imagined it would--I actually cried a bit when I first heard the news. I think the fact that it was a suicide is what hurt the most. I mean, if he had been hit by a truck or something, I think I would have been bummed, but not really sad like I was.

Generally, I'm of the opinion that when someone from western culture kills himself, it's because he's suffering from massive, chronic depression. That's why it's generally not my nature to ask why someone commits suicide: the answer is self-evident. Indeed, Thompson, an alcoholic by all accounts, and self-proclaimed substance abuser, probably was suffering from chronic, massive depression. As my buddy Shane put it in Real Art comments:

why? let's not mistake hunter for someone who was well adjusted and happy. for that matter, nor was spaulding gray.

Still, I find myself desperate to know if there was some sort of suicide note or something--that was actually my first thought when I found out about it. I realize this is irrational. But Hunter S. Thompson was one of my heroes. His life took on great significance to me. So, too, does his death. Rob Salkowitz over at Emphasis Added puts it well:

As of now, we have no clue as to why Thompson picked this moment for his exit. Even many of his fans have little idea about his real personality, as he was a fiercely private individual. Perhaps details will emerge in the days ahead. Personally, I hope it was for his own reasons (dying of cancer, drunk and depressed, about to be busted for kiddie porn, etc.). The idea that someone who was such a close and canny observer of the political scene would decide at this moment that they were better off dead than to see what happens next is too depressing to contemplate.

Click here for the rest.

Thompson, along with others, taught me to despise the cabal of criminals who run the country. What made Thompson unique among these influences is that he also taught me to have a grand time while sticking it to the man--he taught me that having a grand time is sticking it to the man. My fear is that, in this backward, right-wing, anal-retentive era in which we currently live, he no longer found that philosophy to be satisfying. It's like John Lennon deciding that music is pointless.

I know, I know: the philosophy and the man are not one and the same; like I said, it's irrational. Nonetheless, Thompson was a guide, blazing a trail, and if we want to go down that path, we must now find our own way. It is a blow to think that he no longer believed the journey is worth it.

Man, my wife bought me for Christmas a collection of his recent ESPN essays, which I've been slowly working my way through. It's like I was reacquainting myself with an old friend. And then he goes and fucking kills himself.

Here's what I had to say about Thompson, appropriately enough, last Halloween. Here's a piece from the Nation. Here's a great Thompson pic and quote from Dr. Menlo.

"We had two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a saltshaker half-full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of uppers, downers, laughers, screamers... Also, a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of beer, a pint of raw ether, and two dozen amyls. Not that we needed all that for the trip, but once you get into a serious drug collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can. The only thing that really worried me was the ether. There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge, and I knew we'd get into that rotten stuff pretty soon." HST

(Thanks to my friend and former student Cameron for remembering the quote.)

UPDATE My wife Becky told me that she heard some news about this today. From the AP via the Houston Chronicle:

Thompson's suicide blamed on failing health

Douglas Brinkley, a historian and author who has edited some of Thompson's work, said the founder of "gonzo" journalism shot himself Sunday night after weeks of pain from a host of physical problems that included a broken leg and a hip replacement.

"I think he made a conscious decision that he had an incredible run of 67 years, lived the way he wanted to, and wasn't going to suffer the indignities of old age," Brinkley said in a telephone interview from Aspen. "He was not going to let anybody dictate how he was going to die."

Click here for the rest.

Well...I guess that changes everything.

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